on tour with jeremih

By Mack Irwin

Following a run of increasingly ridiculous shows, Jeremih has been removed from the PARTYNEXTDOOR Summer’s Over Tour. On one hand, that’s a real bummer for fans. Jeremih is excellent, one of today’s top R&B/hip-hop artists (Late Nights: The Album is both undeniably terrific and indisputably sexy). But on the other, this will spare concert-goers from some of the lunacy of this tour so far.

PARTYNEXTDOOR and Jeremih have reportedly been feuding over the latter becoming a co-headliner. It’s funny, because one of the things that makes Jeremih’s music so great is his patience. He thrives over understated tracks, building tension in the space between each note. Comparatively, his on-stage demeanor seems awfully petulant. Instead of feuding in private (like normal people) or on social media (like famous people), he and PND have squabbled on stage.

Tuesday 29th November, Chicago: Jeremih walks off his hometown stage after just two songs, swearing at the crowd. It went over pretty well.

Thursday 1st December, Houston: Some dude in a hoodie lip synchs Jeremih’s entire set for him. Seriously.

Friday 2nd December, Dallas: Jeremih calls PARTYNEXTDOOR – the act he is supporting – and his crew “bitch-ass niggas” on stage. In case this isn’t universally understood: don’t do this. It isn’t very polite.

He later tweets that someone put pepper spray (??) in the atmosphere (????) during his performance, causing him to leave the stage.

Over the weekend, Jeremih was removed from the tour. It took swearing at the crowd, a lip-synched show, and roasting the headliner on-stage for him to get kicked off. How does it take that long? And the question we all need answered: if Jeremih hadn’t been kicked off the tour, what would he have done next?

Jeremih will miss the four final shows of the Summer’s Over Tour. This is how they would have (okay, might have) gone otherwise:

Saturday, San Antonio: Jeremih tells the crowd that PARTYNEXTDOOR’s fame comes from his association with Drake, rather than his own merit. The crowd’s reaction is muted, as this is entirely correct; Jeremih is deeply disappointed, while PND is mostly just confused.

Tuesday, Denver: Once again, Jeremih’s entire set is lip-synched by a surrogate. This time, though, it’s Shia Labeouf onstage for an “art installation”. Labeouf knows none of the words. The crowd loves it.

 Friday, LA: As Jeremih climbs onto the stage, someone in the crowd yells ‘PLAY BIRTHDAY SEX’. He murders the entire crowd, just to make sure he gets the right guy. Everyone agrees: he had to do it.

 Sunday, San Francisco: Defeated, Jeremih admits that he just wanted to have a tour cancelled like other famous Chicago artists (s/o Kanye and Chance). ‘Even I don’t like the J. Cole verse on Planez’, he sobs. ‘Does he ever actually rap about anything?’

Jeremih is great, and he seems like he would do a great live show. Just, uh, maybe not on this tour.